Building Trust
Trust is a major brick in the foundation of relationships between lovers (or anybody else). Here are some tips on how to build trust.
Approach
- Talk about regular things in life that you have common ground on (i.e. working, family, cooking)
- Ask questions, tell stories that cause her to feel trust towards you (i.e. I remember this time when I was dating this girl who everybody wanted to date at my office, everybody was so shocked when we announced that we had been dating for 3 months.)
- Be mindful of your body language and remember to keep it positive! Unfold your arms, uncross your legs, show your palms and remember to smile.
- Match and Mirror her body language gestures and it will cause her to psychologically identify with you. Don’t be too obvious about it though (i.e. subtly nod your head in agreement when she nods her head).
First Dates and Relationships
The following information is applicable to building trust at any stage from the approach right through to a (possible) relationship:
- Do what you say. Possibly the most important step to building a foundation of trust is to do what you say you will do. Even if it is a small thing.
- If you do have secrets, let it be known.
- Keep Secrets. No gossip allowed. Never blab someone else’s story.
- Don’t lie or mask the truth even if it is convenient to do so.
- Volunteer information about yourself
- Remember to make eye contact and listen with genuine interest.
- Listen attentively and avoid the temptation to interrupt, criticize or argue. By occasionally restating her key words or phrases you not only clarify communication, but also build rapport.
Final Note
During the first fifteen minutes of a date, you should try listen more than you talk. Keep your attention focused on what she is saying and avoid the temptation to interrupt or dominate the conversation. The quickest way to destroy trust and rapport is to interrupt her (or any other person for that matter). The principals listed above are extremely powerful and should only be used to create trust where trust is warranted.
3 Additional User Tips
Categories: Building Comfort
Hey man, I’ve been doing all of that with this incredible girl. That I’m really into, then awhile ago. This happened, she said that she doesn’t want to talk so often. Because she is afraid for this to turn into a relationship. I totally didn’t get this, what should I do next ?
by Alex Koval
I would recommend checking out the Attraction Checklist and work on building attraction as well as trust. If you just have trust and no attraction you will likely never be anything more than a friend to her. This is applicable whether you want a relationship or just friends with benefits.
by Leonard Gaudet
Alex
she is either a testing you
or b afraid of past relationships
there are 2 ways to go
stop talking to here for a while
or just try to build sexual tension
if this dosnt work remember this
there are “many” beatifull women
if 1 dosnt like you well that’s there loss
pick another
“don’t” try to act like a frend
act like your vaugly interested
in her all of the sudden this will drive her crazy
gl
by Valdo